Dealing with a female covert narcissist? Yes, it’s complicated, but navigating it is not impossible.
Recognizing the subtle manipulations and the value of self-care and boundaries in these situations are two things that my experience has taught me. Why allow the problems of others to sabotage your serenity and wellbeing?
6 Practices That Help in Dealing with Traps a Female Covert Narcissist Uses
1. Recognize You’re Not At Fault
Have you ever experienced an unreasonable feeling of guilt or responsibility for the actions of another person? If so, you may have a covert narcissist on your hands.
To begin with, let me reassure you: You are not to blame. These people frequently appear charming and manipulative, making you doubt your reality.
My recommendation? First, acknowledge that the emotional anguish you are going through is a sign of their underlying troubles rather than a reflection of your shortcomings.
A female covert narcissist enjoys making you feel indifferent to your happiness and well-being in favor of hers.
Acknowledging this gives you the power to perceive the situation more clearly rather than placing the blame on others. Reaching this understanding is a critical first step toward returning your emotional freedom and starting the healing process.
2. Prioritize Self-Care
Self-care becomes important while managing the emotional toll of a relationship with a covert narcissist.
Why? Considering that resilience against deception and emotional abuse is built upon your wellbeing.
I’ve observed how putting self-care first can change a person’s perspective from victimization to empowerment. It helps you see things in a different light and open room for more opportunities.
Self-care is more than bubble baths and meditation; it also involves establishing boundaries, cultivating self-compassion, and participating in soul-nourishing and self-affirming activities.
Recall that taking care of oneself is not being selfish. It’s an essential self-defense mechanism.
By doing things like getting help from dependable friends, working out frequently, or spending time on enjoyable activities, you can build a wall against the negativity that a secret narcissist brings into your life.
Let me reassure you that it is possible to overcome the difficulties presented by a relationship with a covert narcissist.
3. Practice Emotional Detachment
Is emotional detachment the weapon of choice when a covert narcissist is using emotional aggression against you? Emotional detachment is a deliberate method of protecting one’s mental health rather than a means of avoiding situations.
This entails maintaining some objectivity when observing relationships and guarding your emotional health from becoming caught in their deceptive strategies.
I’ve discovered that it’s critical to Identify the patterns: the silent treatments, the guilt-tripping, and the passive-aggressive jabs.
You can start to emotionally distance yourself from them once you see them for what they are: manipulative instruments.
This doesn’t mean you stop loving someone; you stop letting their actions control how you feel. It’s important to observe them instead of taking in their negativity.
4. Set Boundaries
Boundaries are frequently misinterpreted. Many worry that it may intensify arguments or cause the relationship to fail.
I’ve witnessed the importance of setting firm, clear boundaries and displaying how we want to be treated to others.
Setting limits is not only a defensive tactic for anyone involved with a covert narcissist; it’s also a necessary step toward achieving emotional liberation.
Setting boundaries lets the narcissist know that you are no longer a target for their regular tricks. Saying something as straightforward as “I need space and will reach out when I’m ready” or “I will not engage in conversations that belittle me” could accomplish this.
Sure, there may be pushback, and sure, there may be a smear campaign or an attempt to cross certain lines, but don’t back down. You are telling them and, more crucially, yourself that you are no longer a part of their deceptive games when you act with self-respect.
5. Learn to Deal with the Manipulation
Have you ever tried to figure out the rules of a constantly changing game and felt like you’re always one step behind? That’s how dealing with a covert narcissist frequently feels.
You may get depleted and disoriented and start to question your own reality as a result of their influence.
A covert narcissist manipulates you deliberately, with the goal of dehumanizing, controlling, and unseating you.
It loses power once you see it for what it is, which reflects their control-hungry fears rather than your value. I advise my clients to follow their gut feelings.
It’s probably something if it feels strange. You may start disarming the narcissist and taking back control of your emotions and reactions by recognizing the manipulation without participating in it.
6. Get Professional Support
Admitting that some fights weren’t intended to be fought alone is acceptable. Getting help from a professional is a strength, not a weakness.
A coach or therapist offers more than simply a path out; they act as an impartial mirror reflecting your value.
You can recover your sense of self, unravel the web of dishonesty, and create self-defense plans with professional assistance.
Finding a safe place to heal and develop is essential, whether that means counseling, coaching, or support groups. Recall that healing is more than just getting over your pain; it’s about finding your true self and taking back your life.
Have faith in yourself, put your health first, and don’t hesitate to ask for assistance. Is it Worth It to Work with a Covert Female Narcissist?
Is it worth it to interact with a covert narcissist for your emotional and mental health? Years of experience have influenced my perspective of putting yourself first.
This is acknowledging the value of your mental health rather than giving up on someone else. Setting limits, getting help from a professional, and practicing self-care are not merely tactics; they are actions of self-preservation.
However, the answer to the worth issue is not as easy as yes or no. It encourages in-depth contemplation of your values, boundaries, and resilience potential.
It’s about determining if the emotional investment aligns with your well-being and personal development.
Reevaluating your involvement and taking a step back might often be the most powerful course of action.
Final Verdict
In conclusion, it is difficult to face the truth about being in a relationship with a female covert narcissist. It challenges you to examine the dynamics of your relationships and yourself in depth. Is it difficult? Indeed.
Is it worthwhile, nevertheless, to develop, learn, and even reframe these connections in a more positive light? In my opinion, yes.
It’s about balancing respect for your own needs and empathy for others. Recall that putting your mental health first is not selfish; rather, it is essential. If you don’t put yourself first, value yourself, and love yourself, then no one will.
FAQ’s
How do I deal with a covert narcissistic girlfriend?
Understand the traits of covert narcissism, set healthy boundaries, avoid taking things personally, and build a strong support system for yourself.
Should you confront a covert narcissist?
Yes, but use empathic confrontation. Acknowledge their perspective and then firmly set your boundaries to regain balance in the relationship.
Can a female covert narcissist change?
Change is possible for individuals with narcissistic traits, especially if they’re on the lower end of the narcissism spectrum and are willing to work on themselves.
Should you stay with a covert narcissist?
Staying with a narcissist can be challenging due to their behaviors. If they’re unwilling to change, prioritizing your mental health and possibly leaving the relationship may be best.