Why do some people leave social media so abruptly, especially those who appear to thrive on the recognition and appreciation that social media gives them?
Someone who is addicted to likes, shares, and comments suddenly disappears is an odd case.
Known for their desire for approval and control, narcissists may delete their posts from social media in an effort to preserve their reputation or change the story being told about their relationships.
This abrupt retreat could be a calculated attempt to take back control or a test to observe who will approach them and how their absence is received.
Why Do They Pull This Disappearing Act
Did the narcissist disappear from social media?
First, let’s examine what narcissism really is.
Attention, praise, and affirmation are what narcissists thrive on.
Social media gives them the ideal platform to satisfy this need, one where they can carefully create an image that wins them the respect they so desperately want.
Why, then, would someone who appeared to exist solely for approval from others online vanish?
There are many aspects to the answer. Fundamentally, withdrawing can be a strategy used by narcissists to regain control over their reputation or the story that surrounds their relationships.
They may decide to withdraw when the carefully constructed identity they’ve worked so hard to uphold begins to fall apart, whether it’s due to neglect, the discovery of lies, or just the impossibility of maintaining such a charade.
1. The Psychology Behind the Disappearance
I’ve done a lot of research on the dynamics of narcissistic behaviors as a psychologist.
Narcissists’ abrupt disappearance from social media may be an indication of their fragility and internal conflict.
Based on her research on narcissistic personality disorder, Dr. Karyl McBride proposes that these behaviors are a result of a deep-seated fear of not being flawless or of losing control over how other people see them.
This is an important realization. A narcissist views maintaining an air of perfection and control as essential, not simply desirable.
In addition, the act of vanishing is a test; it’s a way to assess how their absence affects their audience, more especially those they aim to influence or control.
They watch while others reach out, show concern, and make an effort to close the gap they have purposefully made by disappearing.
The goal of this manipulation is to ensure their absence and regain control rather than to make amends.
2. The Impact on Victims
These actions can have a significant effect on people who are close to a narcissist.
A sudden disappearance, quiet, or the loss of a consistent communication source can cause confusion, sadness, and a deep sense of loss.
Psychological research has shown that this strategy can strengthen the trauma bond, which is a tie created by cycles of abuse, devaluation, and random reinforcement of reward.
From a professional perspective, everyone impacted by a narcissist’s activities needs to be aware of this pattern.
It might be freeing to realize that the narcissist’s need for control and fears are reflected in this departure, not what you did or did not do.
3. The Cycle Continues
Don’t be fooled; disappearances are frequently temporary.
Because of their constant need for approval and attention, narcissists eventually want to rejoin the social media sites they previously left behind, as Dr. McBride explains.
When they do, they frequently return with more energy, trying to regain the respect and power they believe they are due.
Those caught in its wake may find this cycle confusing and emotionally draining.
Based on years of experience guiding people through these challenging situations, my recommendation is to prioritize your health.
You shouldn’t let a narcissist’s reappearance on social media or in your life control your feelings of value or emotional state.
Are You the Collateral Damage In All of This?
1. Getting to Know the World of the Narcissist
Narcissists fabricate a world that revolves around their own wants, needs, and viewpoints. Others are just supporting roles in their own play; they are the actors.
Because of their insecure desire for approval and validation, this arrogant universe is fragile.
You unintentionally become a part of this drama when you interact with a narcissist, frequently at significant personal expense.
2. The Damage Mechanism
Even while narcissists don’t always mean to harm others, it will inevitably happen.
The urge for dominance and control in narcissists can result in actions that denigrate, humiliate, and mistreat their partners.
Leading expert on narcissism, Dr. Sam Vaknin, characterizes this as a sneaky kind of psychological warfare in which narcissists try to maintain their dominance at the cost of their partner’s welfare.
3. Recognizing the Signs
Do you frequently feel unappreciated, doubt reality, or go through emotional highs and lows depending on your partner’s whims?
These are indicators that you could be the victim of a narcissistic relationship.
Withdrawing from social media or direct communication is a method used by narcissists to create uncertainty and establish a dependency that keeps you dependent on them even when they are not there.
4. The Impact on You
Being collateral damage has a significant effect. It may show up as sadness, anxiety, or low self-esteem.
You can start to doubt your own value and sanity as a result of the manipulation and gaslighting. It’s a confusing event that may cause severe psychological damage.
Final Verdict
The tendency of narcissists to vanish from social media or to ghost their contacts is indicative of a complicated psychology that is motivated by a need for manipulation, validation, and control.
Though many find this behavior difficult to understand, it stems from their incapacity to maintain real ties and their fear of being vulnerable.
It’s critical for those who are directly impacted by these patterns to identify them for what they are: a person coping with severe internal tensions.
FAQ’s
What does it mean when a narcissist goes silent on social media?
When a narcissist goes silent on social media, it could indicate an attempt at manipulation, a lack of interest, or a strategic withdrawal for personal reasons.
Why would a narcissist suddenly disappear?
Narcissists may suddenly disappear as a form of ghosting, exploiting and manipulating others without warning or explanation, showcasing their lack of empathy and entitlement.
Why would a narcissist delete social media?
A narcissist might delete their social media to avoid exposure of their dishonesty, control narrative, or hide their actions from other potential targets.
When a narcissist realizes they lost you?
Upon realizing they’ve lost you, a narcissist might employ denial, pursuit, manipulation, or anger, attempting to regain control or influence over the situation.